I can't quite grasp what the hell is wrong with me these days. I hate to say it out loud but I think I am slightly bored and depressed OR maybe I'm simply obsessed with my passion for food making and photography. I would hope it is the latter because it sounded "better". But I think it is a combination of "everything" to be honest.
Since human mind is a rather complex mechanism, I can say I am quite perplexed by the "many things" that's happened to me. Those unpleasant disputes between business partners and friends did some serious damage on my self-esteem. Every decision that I've made seems to go wrong and this goes from choosing to believe in something or someone to following the path that I think it should be right for my well-being. I've reached a point where I REALLY don't give a damn anymore.
Everyday after my awakening, the very first thing I do is to check my emails and messages. Then, I go straight to the kitchen and start cooking. The following would be styling, shooting, and editing. Yeah, this is pretty much my daily routine. Cooking food that I like seems to be a huge part of my life these days. I think it is the only thing that could fulfill my emptiness at this stage. Personally speaking, I think many people overlooked the amazing things what a humble home cooked meal could do. It's not just about the taste to some. Cooking is the cure to our mind, body, and soul. The entire process if I may say is therapeutic or at least it is to me. I get an immense joy after making something that turns out good and satisfying. I assume these feelings could only be shared with people who love food as much as I do. I also assume that is the only reason why I can't stop cooking.
Today, I made some vegan patties, rosemary buns, teriyaki sauce, and roasted chips. I might've spent a little more time in the kitchen but hey, it is Sunday and it is worthwhile. I think healthy and clean eating's very initial step starts from knowing what's in your food.